On Sunday, FOX decided it would be a good idea to put on a show similar to Seinfeld, but wasn’t Seinfeld. Its name was Mulaney.

Just why, FOX? Seriously. I want to know why you thought this was presentable on air.

Why did I just waste 30 minutes of my life watching this thing you call “entertainment”?

Let me tell you the only thing I laughed at during this show:

There was a scene where Mulaney meets Martin Short’s character for the first time, “The subway was running late and on my way up, on the sideway, there was a wheelchair, knocked over on its side. With no one in it (laughter). That’s a bad thing to see (laughter). Something happened there (laughter). You’d hoped it was a miracle (big laughter). But probably not (laughter).”

I’ll admit. It was funny. But it was the only funny thing about this episode.

John Mulaney can’t act. And not in the “Jerry Seinfeld can’t act either”. As in, he’s a stiff. Elliott Gould is annoying, and wise antidotes didn’t make any sense. And if that was their goal, they failed at bringing us in on the joke. Motif was not funny either. I know! He even came up with the “problem bitch” running gag.  A gag about a joke he made that he couldn’t even make a joke about. What?, You’re asking yourself. Exactly, is my response to your question. I will give some credit to Nasim Pedrad as Jane. She’s pretty good at being crazy. Just not in the right cast (much like Brenda Song in Dads: wrong show, wrong character). Andre is even more annoying.  And don’t even get me started at Martin Short. He may have been great at one point, but the mighty have fallen greatly here (which is probably why he hasn’t done TV in so many years).

The plot was horrible, and the dialogue was…actually not horrible. but the jokes were not good. NOT GOOD. If the goal was to prove they are struggling comedians, you nailed it.

And let’s talk about adding stand up jokes to a TV show. The cool thing about Seinfeld’s stand up was that they realized early on that the stand-up thing was too much, and they reduced it as the show progressed. Also, they moved it from the top of the show, to the bottom of the show, as more of an exclamation point on the episode’s issue. Mulaney had his not-really-that-funny stand up about looking like a little boy (despite being 30+ and the tallest person in the room) to kick off the show. Fine. But then he had another set ready to go, randomly placed, being used as a transitional scene as opposed to actually using it to make a point about the happenings-on of the show. I mean, seriously! Jeez.

You can tell I’m really upset about this show, can’t you?

It was a waste of time. A waste of my time. So I ask FOX:

How in the heaven was Hieroglyph worse than this?

Man…and I have two more episodes of this. Hopefully they’ll cancel it before I can endure anymore.